so a few months ago we watch a movie called " a beautiful mind" and it was about a man that was trapped by his own mind the people living in his mind take over and he can tell what is real anymore. then the next weekend i went Renton youth group and tyler asked so what do you think would be harder being trapped mentally or physically? i personally feel trapped mentally! always being told i can't not good enough, and know i can tell if that is me telling me that or other people? i have had three comments in the last 4 years that have not left the way i look at myself first i was with a friend i meet during the summer, when we first meet that summer we fought all the time no matter on what we found that we had to disagree. then she moved into my world my social circle and we started to get along a few months later we were hanging out at a friends house. i turned to her  and said i'm glad we are friends now and she replied "yeah when i first meet you i didn't think you were worth getting to know" that stung it hurt so bad a few months later i said something to her about it she apologized. i forgave her but won't forget.then i was with another friend she told me that she is friends with people that she can just tolerate. and i was like well i'm i friend she just tolerates are does she consider me a real friend? lets just say we no longer talk... then the last and most hurtful is my own family so  i am seeing this guy and both of my parent are shocked that some one would ever like me and they keep making comments about why he is really with me and it just hurts. so that i why i think that being trap mentally is harder then physical..

***edit **** agian i have talked to the people in my story and we are cool now i am not trying to make anyone feel bad i am just telling my story. what i am feeling and how i cam e to feel like that!!!!!

your thoughts?